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As we approach Valentine\u2019s Day, it\u2019s nice to celebrate love and, one the best parts about it, sex. As a doctor and epidemiologist who studies sex, I bring good news for Valentine\u2019s Day. It\u2019s not just that sex is fun \u2013 it\u2019s also good for your physical and mental health.<\/span><\/p>\n Some of my research is focused on how\u00a0men and women differ\u00a0in the links between\u00a0sexuality,\u00a0mental and physical health, and\u00a0relationship quality. In this article, I write from my findings and that of others on how sex is important to our love, mental health, relations and survival. At the end, I suggest a solution for individuals who are avoiding sex for a common reason \u2013 chronic disease.<\/span><\/p>\n Good sex is an inseparable part of our\u00a0well-being\u00a0and happiness. Those of us who engage in more sex report better\u00a0quality of life. Sexual intercourse is linked to\u00a0high satisfaction\u00a0across life domains. In one of my\u00a0studies\u00a0on 551 married patients with heart disease, individuals who had a higher frequency of sexual intercourse reported higher marital quality, marital consensus, marital coherence, marital affection expression and overall marital satisfaction. These results are replicated in multiple\u00a0studies.<\/span><\/p>\n In a study by another team, partners who both experienced\u00a0orgasmduring sex were considerably happier. These findings are shown inside and\u00a0outside\u00a0of the United States.<\/span><\/p>\n Although\u00a0early initiation of sex\u00a0such as during adolescence is a risk factor for mortality, having a sound sexual life in adulthood is linked to low mortality. In a seven-year follow-up\u00a0study\u00a0of men 17 years old or older, erectile dysfunction and having no sexual activity at baseline predicted increased mortality over time. Similar\u00a0findings\u00a0were shown in younger men. This is probably because more physically\u00a0healthy\u00a0individuals are sexually active.<\/span><\/p>\n There is a two-way road between bad sex and depression. Depression is also a reason for bad sex, particularly for women. And, men who are depressed are more likely to sexually\u00a0abuse\u00a0their partners.<\/span><\/p>\n And it\u2019s important to note, in the wake of continuing news of sexual assault and abuse, that\u00a0forced sex\u00a0in intimate relations make people depressed, paranoid, jealous, and ruins relationships. Couples who experience unwanted sex have a higher risk for experiencing\u00a0other typesof abuse, as bad habits tend to cluster.<\/span><\/p>\n Men and women differ in the degree to which their sexual act is attached to their physical, emotional, and relational well-being. Various reasons play a role among both genders, but for\u00a0women, sexual function is heavily influenced by mental health and relationship quality.<\/span><\/p>\n By contrast, for\u00a0men\u00a0sexual health reflects physical health. This is also intuitive as the most common sexual disorders are due to problems with\u00a0desire and erection\u00a0for women and men, respectively.<\/span><\/p>\n As I explained in another\u00a0article\u00a0in The Conversation, sexual avoidance for those who have a partner or are in a relationship happens for a long list of reasons, including pain, medications, depression and\u00a0chronic disease. Common diseases such as heart disease interfere with sex by causing\u00a0fear and anxiety of sexual intercourse.<\/span><\/p>\n Aging should not be considered as a sexless age. Studies have shown that older adults acquire skills and strategies that can buffer age-related declines in their sexual life, particularly when they are in a positive relationship. This is called seniors\u2019\u00a0sexual wisdom.<\/span><\/p>\n Because people avoid sex for a variety of reasons, there is no single answer for those who want to become sexually active again. For many\u00a0men, physical health problems are barriers. If they suffer from erectile dysfunction, they can seek medical help for that.<\/span><\/p>\n If fear of sex in the presence of chronic disease is a problem, there can be medical help for that as well. For many\u00a0women, common barriers are\u00a0relational dissatisfaction\u00a0and mental health. For both men and women, the first step is to talk about their sexual life with their physician, counselor or therapist.<\/span><\/p>\n At least\u00a0half\u00a0of all medical visits do not cover any discussion about sexual life of patients. Embarrassment and lack of time are among the most common barrier. So make sure you make time to talk to your doctor or health care provider.<\/span><\/p>\n Neither the doctor nor the patient should wait for the other person to start a dialogue about their sexual concerns. The \u201cdon\u2019t tell, don\u2019t ask\u201d does not take us anywhere. The solution is\u00a0\u201cdo tell, do ask.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Shervin Assari<\/span><\/strong> * Published in print edition on 17 April 2018<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Love may make the world go round, but sex keeps it going. There’s been a lot of discussion in recent months about the horrors of bad sex. But it’s important to remember that good sex is good for us. As we approach Valentine\u2019s Day, it\u2019s nice to celebrate love and, one the best parts about […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12765,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[8348],"tags":[9058,5891,4273,9057],"class_list":["post-12764","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-the-conversation","tag-consensual","tag-happiness","tag-health","tag-science"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Couple.jpg?fit=1024%2C683&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8QzSF-3jS","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12764","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12764"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12764\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12765"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12764"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12764"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mauritiustimes.com\/mt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12764"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\u00a0
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Good sex makes us happy<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\nSex keeps us alive<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n
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No sex and forced sex makes us depressed<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\nSex different for men and women?<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\n
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Reasons for avoiding sex<\/span><\/strong><\/h6>\nBack on track<\/span><\/h6>\n
\nAssistant Professor of Psychiatry and Public Health, University of Michigan<\/span><\/p>\n
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