QUOTE OF THE WEEK
"He improves his era and does not boast about it. His character is influential and transforms men."
  -- I. Ching

Letter from New Delhi

Indian Youth, Bollywood & Sex

-- Atul Dev

It is the season for college admissions in India. Newspapers are full of reports of how the entire scenario is shaping up, particularly in Delhi University, which seems to be the most sought after by Indian youth. The pictures printed alongside news reports show girls in the most fancy of clothes making the entire admissions process one big fashion carnival.

While the whole world was watching this very interesting phenomenon with various thoughts in mind, I had just one thought. This is a major landmark in the life of our youth -- the transition from a schoolboy or schoolgirl to a college student. There are many visible changes, such as the uniform gives way to style statements, compulsory attendance to a minimum percentage attendance, from tuck shop during breaks to cafeteria open at all times, a bell to start classes compared to a quiet slide-in into a lecture hall. All these are physical signs of growing up and an expression of or exertions to indicate the difference.

I think the three years spent in college provide the perfect cushion to Indian youth to move from school life to the post-graduate world of professions, specializations and jobs. I spend a lot of my time in the classroom preparing this youth to embark on a chosen career. Most of my students have graduated but are not yet into professions. They join courses, such as those run by my institution, to get some specialization; and, more importantly, to firm up their convictions about the profession they wish to choose.

But not many of us teach them on what to expect from life and how to deal with it. This is particularly true of issues related to emotions and relationships. Some of my colleagues often argue that these are subjects no classroom can teach, yet it is my experience that we can play an important role in the mental development of our students, by example, by practical advice and often by interpretations of what they see happening around them. I can say, with a fair degree of personal satisfaction, that I have been fairly successful in my mission.

Here comes the role that my co-teacher, the Bollywood movie, plays. What I am unable to put across or what I feel a bit diffident of discussing in the classroom is well covered by Bollywood and that gives me an opportunity to discuss, analyze and perhaps advise the youth who sit before me wide eyed and wonderstruck.

It would be saying the obvious that Bollywood has had a tremendous impact on Indian youth and their mental make-up. There are varying views on how this is happening. Some feel that Bollywood comes up with many taboo subjects and presents them as an example for youth to emulate. There are others who feel that Bollywood reflects the reality in some parts of our society and that gives courage to the other part to emulate. Frankly, I see it as a simple phenomenon. Bollywood reflects reality somewhere and helps others to pick up courage to come out in the open of what they are also doing or wish to do. It provides them a visible justification or an example to follow.

Fortunately, I am in the business of teaching communication. Bollywood, thus comes most handy for me to cite as examples of what communication has achieved in a particular situation or for a personality. I love talking about Rakhi Sawant, Mallika Sherawat and Shilpa Shetty and the role media has played in making them household names. I am sure readers of Mauritius Times are familiar with these three names from Bollywood!

My latest favourite from Bollywood is the current Amitabh Bachchan starrer – ‘Cheeni Kum’. It is a brilliantly crafted movie. The casting is perfect, the acting outstanding and the dialogue witty. Just about everything in the film suggests -- "This is reality and let us not be hypocritical about it.” The amazing thing is that it reflects reality that is often suppressed. We have had numerous offerings from Bollywood on similar themes but this one is the best ever. Frankly, I would have named this movie – ‘Cheeni Kum, Conviction Jayada’.

It is not my intention to write a review on this movie because that is the job of more specialized writers! But I am keen to present to you a specific situation. Note the dialogue, when Tabu’s father goes on a 'satyagraha', hoping his 34-year-old daughter will call off her plan to marry the 64-year-old Amitabh:

“Papa, kuch kha lijiye.”

“Kya tu us buddhe ko chhod degi?”

“Nahin.”

“To phir main kuch nahin khaoonga.”

“Jaise aapki marzi”, she says and calmly walks out of the room!

A hunger strike may be a bit extreme. But these kinds of power struggles are commonly enacted in our homes and especially at this time of the year, when students make choices related to careers. What ‘Cheeni Kum’ shows you is that if you know what you want and are determined to have it, no one can 'force' you into a different direction. Yes, marrying a man 30 years older is not common but ‘agar meri khushi isi main hai’ and I am prepared to bear the consequences, and then so be it. The situation is all about -- "I love you, you're my dad, but finally it's my life!"

The moral of the story is: if you stand firm for what you believe in, the world will come around to accept it. Let your passion burn bright -- be it for a person, profession or philosophy of life, fuel it with conviction. The slightest breeze of disapproval snuffs out only a candle, if there is fire in your belly, it will burn on!

Bollywood has portrayed the twin themes of love and sex regularly. In fact, if I may put it very bluntly, they have taken on the mantle of becoming ‘teachers’ in a subject that needs to be taught in our classrooms. On the other hand we have the recent decision of one of our state government, Madhya Pradesh, having decided to end the Adolescent Education Programme, two years after it was introduced in class IX and XI, stating -- "sex education has no place in Indian culture”. Based on the advice rendered by the 'Shiksha Bachao Samiti' (remember that Madhya Pradesh is governed by the BJP!), the State government has decided that yoga should be included in the curriculum in place of sex education.

I do not think that people in power, who seem to be self appointed custodians of Indian culture, are aware of the changes that are taking place in society.  Fifty years ago we only had Binaca Geet Mala on All India Radio. Today we have item girls in bikinis doing the jig on prime time television. Fifty years ago Bollywood couples only danced around trees. Today they kiss, have sex and sometimes even get pregnant before marriage. Fifty years ago most Indian girls attained puberty at age 13-14. Today, it is as early as 9 years.

I recently came across a survey done in the same state by the Madhya Pradesh Voluntary Health Association amongst 250 girls in the 10-19 age group in 12 districts. The survey found that 70 per cent want sex education to be made a part of curriculum in schools and over 60 per cent of the girls were facing a communication gap with their parents due to shyness and fear. Since a majority of Indian parents are unlikely to be comfortable talking about sex with their kids, a formal sex education program has its merits. The truth however is that formal sex education has little or no impact on the decision to have sex. The external environment such as peer group interaction, media imagery and individual personality – sex drive, appetite for risk, etc, are responsible and these factors are beyond the state’s control. 

In 1996, the Durex ‘global sex survey’ found that the average Indian male had sex for the first time at age 25. The same annual survey concluded in 2005 that Indians on an average lost their virginity at the age of 19.8 years. Of course I would not take this at face value. But some of these statistics do seem to be close to the truth. Indians are the ‘oldest’ to lose their virginity – at age 19.8 years! Indian youth also had the fewest sexual partners in the world, just 3 as against a global average of 9 in the same age group.

So the culture brigade can feel ‘happy’ at our relative conservatism or perhaps be alarmed at our increased promiscuity compared to previous generations. Indian youth is changing and it is time we learnt to accept this fact. It is not Bollywood that is spoiling them; in fact, it is educating them.

(Atul Dev is a New Delhi based senior freelance journalist. He can be contacted at: atuldev@airtelbroadband.in)